"Chase Li, you have really become more disgusting now."
At this time, Li Weihan, Cui Guiying, a group of brothers and sisters of the Li family, Aunt Zhang and several villagers who came to the canteen in the evening to buy things all stared at Li Chaiyuan with smiles and curiosity.
Everyone was quiet and eager.
The simple yearning for beautiful things is people's nature.
There is nothing more moving and gratifying to onlookers than being able to listen to each other's voices even though they are far apart.
Li Chaiyuan still held the microphone hard with both hands, the shy expression on his face not only did not fade but became more intense, he turned slightly sideways, as if he wanted to avoid everyone's gaze, but in everyone's eyes, it was more like a child's refusal and greeting.
Everyone thought this scene was very cute, and the smiles on their faces were even brighter, and they all opened their mouths slightly, waiting for the next conversation.
Although they can't hear the voice on the other side of the microphone, they can use the child's response to make up what the child's mother said and asked.
"Mom, I'm doing well at home, I'm very well-behaved."
"Shouldn't you be angry, shouldn't you throw the microphone angrily, shouldn't you cry or make trouble, shouldn't you question me as a mother?
Oh, by the way, you won't.
Hehe,
They are in a circle next to you, looking at you, right?"
"Mom, I'm not very homesick, I'm very happy here."
"Li Chaiyuan, it's just the first time you've seen them, and they've seen you for the first time since you were born, so do you need to continue performing in front of them?"
"My grandparents are very good to me, Panzi, Leizi, Yingzi, Shitou, Huzi, and my brothers and sisters are also very good to me, and they all take me to play."
"Chase Li, you are really hypocritical, you obviously look down on them in your bones and think they are stupid and stupid, but you still want to create your image in front of them."
"The village is fun, there are fields, there are canals, you can catch fish, catch frogs, the sauce made by grandma is delicious, grandma said that mom you also loved to eat when you were a child."
"Don't you feel tired, my son, why are you so tired of this game?"
"I also went to Aunt Xianghou's house, Aunt Xianghou told me a lot about my mother's past, and many people still remember you, Mom."
"I'm really amazing, I gave birth to a son who makes me feel so disgusted."
"Mom, are you busy with work over there, grandparents hope you pay more attention to your body, eat on time, and don't tire yourself."
Li Zhuyuan looked at Li Weihan and Cui Guiying as he spoke, and the old couple nodded vigorously, signaling Li Zhuiyuan to continue.
"I originally thought I could control it, but your birth is like a mirror, reflecting the self I hate the most, Li Chaiyuan, do you know that every time I see you in the past few years, I have been resisting my urge to strangle you.
Every time you call me 'Mom', in my ears, it is like a devil's whisper."
Li Chaiyuan nodded while listening, in the eyes of everyone, it seemed to be following his mother's love instructions, everyone seemed to be able to guess that his mother must be teaching him various precautions on the other end of the phone, be good, be obedient, and don't be naughty.
"I understand, Mom, I know, I understand."
"I try to mend this skin stitch on my body, and every morning when I wake up, I have to look in the mirror and hint and confirm to myself over and over again.
But you always want to tear my skin apart again and again.
You are me, I am you.
Li Chuiyuan,
We mother and son,
They are all monsters in human skin."
"I understand, Mom, don't worry, I will be obedient."
Li Zhuiyuan put his ears to the microphone and shook his body gently, like a child who was a little impatient being nagged by his parents, and a little felt that he had lost face, but he was sweet.
"Your father helped me control my illness, and my marriage also gave me some help.
Your birth has ruined all my efforts for so many years.
In my eyes,
Li Chuiyuan,
You are a mistake that shouldn't have happened."
"Mom, can you send me some more snacks, that kind of cookies, we like to eat them very much. There are also some stationery, everyone likes my pencil case very much, I promised everyone to give it to them."
When Shitou Huzi and the others heard this, they all hugged each other excitedly.
"I shouldn't have tried to find a treatment for you after discovering your essence, and the treatment failures in you again and again seemed to have made me witness my own setbacks.
My life is already dark, and it is you who completely blocked my last bit of light.
Xiao Yuan,
Why don't you die?"
"Mom, you too."
"If you had realized that you had died early, it might still inspire my motherhood, wouldn't it?"
"Well, I won't."
"I'm going to participate in a secret project that has a high risk factor, and I don't know if I can come back alive."
"Mom, you have to pay attention to your body, I will worry about you."
"I am telling you this because I don't want these truthful words to be hidden in my heart after I die, but I don't have time to tell you, I think we need such a confession between us.
In fact, you have always understood that while I can see through you, you can also see through me, right?"
"Well, I'll listen, I'll write it down, Mom."
"This path is chosen by yourself.
When I divorced your father, let your father beg you bitterly, and it was you who firmly chose to follow me.
Your father always thought that I was sick, that I was torturing you father and son in a different way, causing pain to your father and son.
But what he didn't know was that his son was a demon even more terrible than me, and all his fatherly love manifestations, in the eyes of his beloved son, were just outright clown performances.
He was sad, he had applied for a polar scientific expedition project.
When I wanted to help you change your surname back, your grandfather disagreed, it was you who insisted on changing your surname.
Your grandma said that if you follow me, you will never enter the house again, but you still grabbed my cuffs and left with me.
Chase Li, do you think that if you do this, you can move me and change my mind?
There are only irritability shouts in my heart:
why
Why do you insist on pesting me and continue to torture me!"
"Okay, okay, I know everything, Mom, you don't have to say this anymore, I know everything."
"I'm going to join the project team tomorrow, I don't know if I can come back safely, I just hope that if I can come back alive, there will be no you in my life.
I figured it out, and I had made up my mind.
Li Chaiyuan, I want to get rid of your dog skin plaster.
I will transfer your guardian to your father's side, although your father is not there, your grandparents should be happy to accept you, after all, you are a child who can enter the junior class, and you can be the pride of their family."
"I don't want anything else, just send snacks and stationery, I want a new one, Mom."
"I know you won't want it, but you will still try hard to grab anything that has anything to do with me, so I will send you back to my hometown, a place I will never go back to in my life.
I will transfer the guardian to my father, your household registration, and your student status will be transferred.
I am very grateful for this project, which has given us the convenience of fully arranging kinship."
"Mom, I live in my grandfather Li Sanjiang's house now, my grandfather likes me and called me to live with him for a while, my grandfather is very good."
"I know."
"Well, that's it, Mom, I'm going to give the microphone to grandpa, and grandpa wants to continue talking to you."
Li Zhuiyuan waited for a while with the microphone, and waited until there was a sound of footsteps leaving and approaching, and then reluctantly handed the microphone to Li Weihan.
Li Weihan held the microphone: "Hey, Lan Hou, don't worry, Xiao Yuanhou is fine here, we will take good care of him."
Li Zhuiyuan didn't want to stay here anymore, watching his grandfather chat with Aunt Xu.
"Grandpa, grandma, I'm going back to my grandfather's place for dinner."
Cui Guiying hurriedly said: "Go back quickly, don't let your grandfather wait, your grandfather and I will go ask your grandfather after a while to see when you can return to your secular home."
"Okay, grandma. Goodbye grandma, goodbye grandpa, goodbye everyone."
Li Chaiyuan waved goodbye to everyone, then turned around and left.
Runsheng followed Li Chaiyuan, he was very hungry, but now he didn't dare to remind and urge the boy to go faster.
Although the boy has always called himself "Brother Runsheng", when there are many people and when there are only the two of them, the sound of "brother" sounds different.
The former is a warm and respectful title for Brother Dai, while the latter is called "Brother Runsheng" as if his name is "Brother Runsheng".
But he didn't have much curiosity to understand, his grandfather said he was stupid, so don't bother thinking about what a smart person is thinking in his head.
He felt that the boy's mood was not high, and all he could do was walk slowly with the boy.
In Li Chaiyuan's mind, his mother's words on the other end of the phone echoed over and over again.
I am very pleased that my mother hasn't said so much to herself in one breath for a long time.
It's just that he knew that his mother's words were not actually said to his son, but more like the one she said to her mother in her heart.
And the mother regards her son as the cold embodiment of her heart.
If it were himself, if he were the expressionless self in the cabinet mirror, he would become his own child in the future, and he would go crazy and hysterical.
I tried my best to hide the coldness that I tried to suppress, but in the end, I became a child who clung to myself all day long, shouting "Mom".
At this time, Li Chaiyuan smiled.
He found it funny, like a comically satirical black-and-white silent film.
He stopped and squatted down facing the small canal on the side of the road.
It was already dark, and all that could be reflected in the canal water at this moment was a dark face.
Li Chaiyuan looked at this face, but he didn't know who it was.
Runsheng also squatted down next to him and silently lit a stick of incense.
Li Zhuyuan picked up a stone next to him, faced his figure in the water, and threw it down.
"Poof......
After a circle of folds, it immediately returned to its original state.
He knew that his mother was terminally ill.
Tonight's phone call is a kind of self-defeat for herself, she is tired, she is desperate, she will completely let go of the struggle, no longer resist, she will integrate.
Thinking in a good direction, this phone call was her last confidant.
Although it is full of ugliness, abuse and curses.
At the same time, there is indeed a kind of hatred, even jealousy.
Her human skin was completely torn, and she also wanted to tear off her son's skin.
So Mom, do you want to find a similar kind for yourself after you are completely destroyed?
Are you angry?
Some.
But whether it is strong or not, Li Chaiyuan doesn't know, because he can understand.
Because this is absolute reason.
She proved with her practice that no matter how much struggle there is, it is useless and meaningless, so she wants to save herself this process in this way.
But Li Chaiyuan was very confused, because she shouldn't have sent herself back, she shouldn't have sent herself back to Nantong.
Sometimes, don't listen to what others say, you have to see what she does.
Continue to stay in Beijing, continue to attend junior classes, continue to study step by step, graduate step by step, and assign work units step by step......
As long as you follow the class step by step, you can become the same person as her earlier.
She only needs to do nothing to turn herself into her, because she fell ill earlier than she did at that time, and it was much more serious than her.
But she still sent herself back to her hometown, and she said she would never come back in her life.
Is it because this is the last fantasy you have always kept in your heart?
This is the last protection and expectation you have for me?
Do you think life here is the reason why you get sick later than your son, and you can get married and have children and live a normal life?
Li Chaiyuan held his head with both hands, his expression painful: Or is it all just my wishful thinking?
Runsheng saw the boy's body start to sway back and forth, and he seemed to want to plunge into the ditch.
Li Chaiyuan really wanted to fall in, jump into the ditch, and cry while slapping the water, he thought he should vent at this moment.
But in the end, his figure stopped because he felt it was naïve to do so.
Li Chaiyuan turned his face sideways and looked at Runsheng who was squatting beside him.
Runsheng shivered and immediately looked away, he didn't dare to make eye contact with these eyes.
Li Chaiyuan looked at the incense stick in Runsheng's hand, he stretched out his hand and gently held the tip of the burning incense.
The burning pain came quickly, but there was no expression on the boy's face.
Until, we have reached a critical point.
"Hiss......"
The boy finally let go of his hand, his face in pain.
"It hurts so much......
The voice also turned into an aggrieved child's voice.
Runsheng turned around, he had just sensed the shaking of the incense candle in his hand, and then looked at the wound on the palm of Li Chaiyuan's hand, and immediately blamed himself anxiously:
"I'm sorry Xiaoyuan, I didn't mean to, I really didn't mean to."
Runsheng thought that when he just turned his head, he accidentally burned the incense in his hand to the boy.
"It's okay, Brother Runsheng, I was curious and grabbed it."
Runsheng's tears were about to flow, and Xiaoyuan made up such a lame reason at this time in order not to blame himself.
He felt even more guilty, he actually wanted to think about it, thinking that Xiao Yuan's eyes just now were terrifying.
Li Chaiyuan looked at the wound on his palm.
Has the condition worsened to the point where he began to seek self-harm?
Li Zhuiyuan stood up and said, "Brother Runsheng, let's go back."
"Your wound ......"
"It's okay, I'll ask Aunt Liu for some ointment to apply it."
Walking home, the big guy on the dam was still eating, probably deliberately slowing down and waiting for him to come back.
"Xiaoyuan, is it my mother's phone?" "Well, yes, grandfather."
Li Zhuiyuan sat down and picked up chopsticks to eat while recounting the conversation between himself and his mother.
He was very happy and happy.
Like all normal children, there will always be a period when their parents are their idols, and they are all "my father" and "my mother".
Li Sanjiang listened very happily, interjecting from time to time, and every time Li Chaiyuan would give him an answer, which made Li Sanjiang even happier, and kept tapping the bowl with chopsticks and said: "I know, I know, hahaha."
Aunt Liu is also very happy, her personality is already cheerful, and she is happy to see that the atmosphere at home has become more relaxed.
Even Liu Yumei asked Li Chaoyuan a few questions.
I felt in my heart, no matter how smart this child is, he can't change the child's nature after all.
Runsheng ate while nibbling on the incense, watching Li Chaiyuan's performance, he subconsciously thought that the silence on the way home was just the child missing his mother.
He didn't have parents, only grandpa, so watching Li Chaiyuan keep telling everyone, his face gradually showed a look of longing:
It turns out that having a mother is such a happy thing.
Only Ah Li silently put down her chopsticks.
She likes to look at the boy's expression, but the excited and happy boy in front of him has no light in his eyes.
After the meal, Li Chaiyuan forcibly took Li Sanjiang to Zheng Datang to prescribe some medicine.
Originally, a shot would have been more effective, but Li Sanjiang was reluctant.
After returning, everything was business as usual.
Runsheng sat in front of the TV, smoking a cigarette while watching TV.
After Aunt Liu cleaned the kitchen stove, she was busy coloring the paper.
Ah Li was coaxed by Chai Li and went back to the house with Grandma Liu to sleep.
Li Chase was far behind the house and finished his horse steps seriously.
When I returned to the second floor, I saw Li Sanjiang pouring laundry detergent into his hand.
On the stone slab next to the water tank, there is a basin of hot water and a handkerchief hanging.
"Grandfather......"
"Grandpa, I have been reported again."
"Congratulations."
"Go, go, go, shovel!"
"Hehe."
Because his mother's phone was interrupted, Li Chaiyuan realized that his good luck problem had not yet been solved.
It's a pity that I can't ask the grandfather directly, because the grandfather himself doesn't understand.
So, what is the deal that cost so much good luck?
Li Zhuiyuan walked back to his bedroom, turned on the lamp, and took out "Liu's Qijiao".
Open and frown.
He missed Wei Zhengdao's words.
I took out so many sets of books from the basement, only Wei Zhengdao wrote them, and I was most comfortable reading them.
Resisting the discomfort, I looked down carefully page by page.
I don't know if I have gradually begun to adapt to this kind of dog crawling charm,
Or is the content of "Liu's Qijue" really mysterious and mysterious.
The more Li Chase Yuan looked at it, the more he felt it, and gradually couldn't stop.
This book talks about the feng shui of rivers, lakes and seas.
A very special category, because "Feng Shui" in the normal sense has a relatively open pattern, water is one of them, and the most important thing is mountains and land.
After all, whether the living live or the dead sleep for a long time, they are basically on land.
And this book focuses on the water system, which involves water burials, water hells, water catastrophes, etc., and the mountains and land have become supplementary.
From a practical point of view, we can use an analogy:
Other Feng Shui books, if you really understand and read them, you can feel that there may be ancient tombs here.
After reading this book, when you are on a boat, standing on the bow of the boat, you can occasionally feel something and reach out and point out: Here, there may be death.
Li Chaiyuan was not in a hurry to read the Liu family's book, but picked up "Qin's Observation of the Jiao Method" and read it again.
It seems that the Liu family and the Qin family should have been big families of equal status on the river.
The theme is the same, but the route approach is different.
This is of great benefit to learners, as they can confirm each other and deepen their understanding.
As long as you understand both books, your understanding of feng shui will become extremely profound.
I glanced at the time and it was time for me to go to bed.
Li Chaoyuan put down the book, turned off the lamp, took the basin to take a shower, then went back to the bedroom, lay down on the bed, folded the quilt, lay down, and went to bed.
A quarter of an hour later, Li Zhuiyuan sat up, he couldn't sleep.
No matter how strong the logical inertia of behavior is, it cannot suppress the impact of my mother's phone call on my heart.
Pushing open the door, walking to the terrace, and sitting down on the wicker chair, Li Zhuyuan looked at the dark night sky, dazed.
I don't know how long it took, the door of the east room was opened by Liu Yumei, and looking at her granddaughter who was about to go out, she could only have time to hang a cloak on her.
Looking up, she saw the boy sitting on the balcony on the second floor, and Liu Yumei had mixed feelings.
Is it not enough to be together during the day, and we have to play together at night?
But looking at the boy's indifferent expression, she was a little puzzled: Isn't this child okay at dinner, why is he like this now?
Did you miss your mother when you went to bed at night?
Although it is said that children are natural, Liu Yumei feels that this little boy should not be so fragile.
This look is a replica of his own Ah Li after sitting on the threshold.
Soon, she saw her granddaughter appear on the second floor, and the girl sat down on the wicker chair next to the boy.
After a while, the girl actually took the initiative to divide the cloak on her body in half and put it on the boy.
Liu Yumei's eyes widened, her granddaughter would actually take the initiative to care for people?
He has been living in Li Sanjiang's house for a while, but Ah Li's condition has only been controlled and has not deteriorated further.
It was only after the kid also moved into his grandfather's house that Ahri's condition showed signs of improvement, like a piece of ice, and finally water droplets hung out.
But no matter how much it gets better, it can't compare to today's day and night!
At first, he would nod and shake his head to express it, and now he can still make this kind of active care move.
Liu Yumei raised her head, not letting tears overflow in her eyes, she really saw that the hope of her granddaughter's recovery seemed to really not take too long.
She went into the house, sat down at the offering table, and pointed at them:
"Ah Li will get sick because of your irresponsibility, but if you left a little spirit to protect you according to tradition, Ah Li would not have become like that."
Picking up the handkerchief and wiping her tears, Liu Yumei said with a crying voice:
"If I had known that smashing your tablet would be useful to Ah Li's condition, I should have split you all into firewood long ago."
……
Li Zhuiyuan didn't know when the girl came, she seemed to have been here for a long time, and she was covered with something on her back, warm.
"Are you here?"
The girl looked at the boy, this time she took the initiative to hold the boy's hand, and then she seemed to notice something, and while lowering her head, she broke the boy's palm apart.
In the palm of his hand, there was a wound.
The girl rubbed it with her fingertips.
This is a rare warmth, Li Chaiyuan couldn't help but smile at the corner of his mouth, but this smile quickly froze.
Because all five fingers of the girl were pressed against her palms, the five nails, neither long nor short, pierced directly into her flesh.
"Hiss......"
Li Zhuiyuan stood up in pain, and his body almost twisted.
"Ahri, I hurt, I ......"
It is said that ten fingers are connected to the heart, but the palm of the hand is still soft and sensitive, and the girl's five nails are deeply embedded in the flesh, and they are still exerting force.
This taste is like using a nail rake in a plowshare.
I was squatting next to the water canal before, and I took the initiative to reach out and hold the incense in Runsheng's hand, and I really didn't feel any pain at that time, because I was not normal at that time.
But now, I am normal.
The girl who has always listened to herself the most seems to have ignored herself at this time.
Her eyelashes were beating, her body was shaking, and the gloss in her eyes was gone, replaced by numbness.
A dangerous aura emanated from her.
In the past, every time she wanted to burst out, the boy only needed to hold her hand to calm her down, but now, it was the boy's hand that was exacerbating her uprising.
Li Zhuyuan pulled his hand away from the girl.
The girl's body gradually regained calm, her eyelashes no longer beat, and her eyelids drooped.
She turned around and walked towards the staircase.
The cloak that was originally covering the two of them fell, and Li Chaiyuan picked it up and wanted to put it on the girl.
But as he approached again, the girl stopped and her back began to tremble.
Li Zhuyuan had to stop, and even took a few steps back.
The girl returned to normal and continued to walk forward, disappearing into the stairs.
Soon, the girl appeared on the dam, and the door of the east house was not closed, so she walked in.
Li Chaiyuan stood on the second floor, still holding the red cloak in his hand.
Previously, girls were always fond of collecting everything that had something to do with them, but now she rejects not only contact with herself, but also things that have stained her.
Li Zhuyuan lowered his head and looked at the bloody five openings in his palm, still bleeding.
He was in pain, but he was not angry, but guilty.
The fingers of his left hand wiped away the blood, exposing the burn in the central area.
He knew why the girl suddenly became angry.
Because she discovered that the person who had pinned her hopes on helping her climb out of the abyss was actually taking the initiative to walk into the abyss.
The greatest torture in this world is to give you hope first in despair, and then extinguish this hope with your own hands.
She was already used to it.
Li Chaiyuan went to rinse the wound, simply found a clean piece of cloth to bandage it, and then returned to his bedroom.
Lying on the bed, he didn't know if it was really drowsiness, or if he subconsciously longed for a good night's sleep and then dawn, everything would be restored.
In short, he fell asleep.
He slept very lightly, and many times he was awakened by inexplicable heart palpitations after a short sleep, but he did not open his eyes and forced himself to continue sleeping.
Finally, after countless times, through his eyelids, he felt a clear sense of light.
The sky is bright.
Turning his head sideways, he opened his eyes, and there was no one on the chair at the door.
Li Chaiyuan took the washbasin and walked out of the bedroom, and when he passed by the master's room, he saw that the grandfather was not on the bed through the screen door.
After washing, I walked downstairs, but I couldn't see Runsheng on the table on the first floor.
I didn't go to bed too late today, why did everyone get up so early?
Li Chaiyuan walked up the dam, and Aunt Liu walked out of the kitchen: "Xiaoyuan, it's early, I'll have breakfast later."
"Aunt Liu, where is my great-grandfather?"
"The village chief came over before dawn in the morning, called your grandfather to the town government, and said that there was an emergency, so Runsheng took your grandfather there."
Li Chaiyuan nodded, and then looked at the East Room.
Behind the threshold of the east room, a girl in a black dress sat there, her feet on the threshold, her eyes level, without the slightest emotion.
"Xiaoyuan, Xiaoyuan, come here quickly."
In the morning, when the granddaughter didn't get up as early as usual, she sensed something was wrong.
After getting up and dressing up, he actually picked up the bench and sat behind the threshold.
In an instant, Liu Yumei only felt that the sky had fallen!
Now, the only thing she was counting on was a boy.
Li Chaiyuan walked towards the east room, and as soon as he got closer, the girl's body began to tremble, her hands were slowly clenched unconsciously, and the depths of her eyes also turned red.
Liu Yumei immediately stretched out her hand to stop Li Chaiyuan from approaching, stepped forward and squatted beside her granddaughter, constantly whispering comfort.
The granddaughter's reaction was more violent than when strangers approached before.
Chase Li stepped back for a while, and after seeing the girl calm down under Grandma Liu's comfort, he bit his lip and took a deep breath.
Yes, the same as I thought before going to bed.
After a night's sleep,
All recovered.
……
"What, tell me again, I didn't hear clearly!"
Li Sanjiang sat in the office of the Civil Affairs Bureau and patted the table, he actually heard it clearly, but he couldn't believe it.
The director of the Civil Affairs Bureau and several staff members could only patiently repeat it to him, even if it was already the fourth time.
They also received a notice from their superiors that there was something that needed to be approved by the special affairs department, so they came to the unit early and waited.
In fact, after seeing the faxed document, they also felt extremely incomprehensible.
These days, there is actually such an operation?"
"Uncle, your name is Li Sanjiang, right?"
"I brought my ID card and household registration book, don't you think so?"
"Yes, yes, actually, things are already very clear, now, it depends on whether you are willing to sign, if you don't want to, we will type these documents back."
Li Sanjiang picked up the pen a little dazedly,
asked:
"Is it true that if I sign this word, Xiao Yuanhou will fall into my account?"
(End of this chapter)